Lena Luthor Is Her Own Kryptonite

Hello, friends, and welcome! Two LenaCaps in one week? I know, it’s pretty crazy. But there was very little Lena in Sunday’s episode, so it didn’t feel as daunting as some episodes did. And though there wasn’t much Lena, the Lena we got was of high quality. Stripes and leather and elevators, oh my!

I do want to start out by saying there’s a bit of a mental block for me to really get into these episodes because I’m not a fan of Jon Cryer’s portrayal of Lex. As you may know, I take issue with the fact that he’s only a handful of years younger than the brilliant Brenda Strong, who plays his mother, and way more than a handful of years older than Katie McGrath, and that just really torches my black Kryptonite. But that aside, he lands a bit too far on the cheesy side for me.

I mean, Lex Luthor is also a condescending prick, but I don’t think that has anything to do with the actor. I know he’s a sociopath bent on world domination, blah blah, killing the supers, yadda yadda, and at the end of the day, he’s a tiny, insecure man who can’t fathom a world in which someone could twist him into a pretzel…or beat him at chess on the regular. So he has to tear down those people he knows deep down are better than him, either with Kryptonite or by poking their brains until he feels like he’s won. And, well, I see enough of that in real life. Call me what you want, but I don’t need to see some insecure mediocre white dude (in the form of him OR Agent Liberty) on my TV, too, cackling like a cartoon supervillain.

I know that’s an opinion, not a fact, but even when Supergirl is over-the-top, it’s never been Quest for Peace level for me. There’s always been some veritas to balance out the ridiculousness, and this storyline is really lacking in the former.

Okay, ugh, enough. Let’s get to the good parts, shall we?

We start our journey with Lena as a witness at her brother’s trial four years ago. She and Jimmy (because how else would he get in the episode, I guess) testify against him, and we learn that Lex cut Lena out of his life and also kidnapped and tortured Jimmy. She looks so scared and sad on the stand, having to testify against the one family member she thought she could trust. Not only does she turn over the entire paper trail she had with her brother, but she wore a wire as he was monologue-ing when he tried to Red Sun the Earth. The people she cares about (and their approval) may be her Kryptonite, but nothing will stop Lena from being a good person and doing the right thing.

Lena Luthor needs a hug dot gov

Then we get a bunch of scenes without Lena in which Lex and the Kasnians and Kasnian Kara are doing a bunch of stuff in which she is being brainwashed to work for them. Whatever. I don’t call it a LenaCap or my health, friends. Lex decides to take his red protege on a walkabout, and he noses around Kara’s apartment, has a close run-in with Actual!Alex, but then has to rush off to prison and leaves KK to get herself back home. Instead, she snags Kara’s journal and starts to learn about her double’s life, especially her “Alex’s” sister, Lena.

At L-Corp, KK tracks Lena down, because she’s become intrigued JUST BY READING ABOUT HER IN OK (Original!Kara)’s JOURNAL. And then looks at her like this?

I thought you’d be…balder.

She just stands there in awe of Lena, really. Like, so anxious and excited to meet this person she’s only heard and read about.

Me if I ever met Katie McGrath.

Eve manages to intercept them, though, and sends Lena on a wild-goose chase in one of the labs. She tears into KK, who fights back. She talks about how maybe America isn’t so bad because Kara Danvers is doing good and is a good person and has friends…like Lena.

Reverently, with a Kasnian accent: Lena.

But Kara lets Eve convince her to leave her ~~bestie~~ ~~gal pal~~ ~~soul mate~~ ~~team owner~~ ~~future friend~~ Lena, but not before watching her go.

♬ Okay, bye ♬

God bless Lena Luthor opening doors, am I right?

When Lena opens a door, she smashes through the glass ceiling.

Or something similarly inspirational.

Anyway, Lex manages to communicate with Lena via some sort of Jedi hologram. You know, from prison. Totally normal. She makes a really snide crack about his hair — or lack thereof — and he tells her he needs help because he’s dying. He chooses to omit the part where he gave himself cancer so she’d feel sorry for him and save him, because Lex, under all that mustache twirling and head polishing, is a smart guy. He knows how to manipulate his sister and get what he wants. He insinuates the tiniest bit that maybe she’s not as “good” as she thinks she is, and then points out that helping him, her enemy, is what a truly good person would do.

Insert that “doing advanced math” meme here.

And it works, because Lena’s her own worst enemy.

Bonus points to the hair, makeup, and wardrobe teams this season. They’re the real heroes.

Years and years of beating yourself up about something you can’t change will do that to you, you know?

Indirectly, because Lex gives Kasnian Kara his Harun-el’d blood, Lena saves her life, which I think we all know is what she would have wanted.

I think I need a fifth phone.

Kara lands in James’ hospital room and tells him and Alex that Lex is causing wacky trouble again. James is the first to mention Lena (I DON’T BELIEVE THAT WOULD HAPPEN AT ALL), and Alex quickly volunteers as tribute to fetch her favorite CEO, who is being zip-tied to her office chair by Eve, who also leaves a letter on her desk. A love letter, maybe? Costco list of office supplies? “I’m double-crossing your brother and want to make sweet, sweet Harun-el with you until the end of time” message? I guess we will find out next week.

Our episode closes on Kasnian Kara, flying above her twin’s city in a suit that’s way better than Original!Kara’s, if only because of the pants. I know once Lena sees that, she’s going to be in her lab designing her bestie a new one.

Stay the night, indeed.

Monica’s Random Thoughts of Randomness:

Why didn’t they just give Lex a mustache to twirl?
I do like how they explained Eve’s existence at Catco, with Lex, and with Lena. I thought that was well done. I get a much stronger feeling than I have had in the past that some of the writers actually watch this show.
What the fuck is that prison.
Kasnian Kara only knowing the word “Alex”? Oh, my heart.
I only ever want to love and protect Kasnian Kara. I know there’s no way this will end well, but I just want her to live in National City with Regular Kara and date Lena and go to game night and split Supergirl work and help Kara have a normal life.
Nice job explaining away the earrings, too, writers.
Oh, Lex. That wig is your real crime against the world.
I guess everyone has a key to Kara’s loft, huh?
You expect me to believe that both Lillian and Lex Luthor know that Kara is Supergirl but Lena doesn’t? Nope. Nope, nope, nope. Lena knows.
And you expect me to believe DEO Director Alex Pamela Danvers sees her sister at her apartment when she shouldn’t be there and DOESN’T say something to her about it later? Especially when she wasn’t wearing her glasses? Same question about Lena, only harder.
Why wouldn’t Kara just fly back from Smallville and water her own plants?
Lex: I have been planning out this intricate way to destroy Superman to the letter but am just going to tell Kasnian Kara to find her own way back. Sure, Lex.
Shout-out to Andrea Brooks and her amazing portrayal of Eve, and bonus points to the writers for giving her such great material to work with. She just looks like she’s having the best time.
Lex really seems to spend very little time in prison. Karen and Georgia would have a field day with that.
When did Lex grab his Lexosuit from his sister?
What a smug little prick to automatically assume that he could get the Harun-el to work.
Where did Lex get that tearaway prison jumpsuit?
Surprise! Cameo! By! The! Suit!

Somehow, my love for Kasnian Kara (and my love for her love of Lena and Actual!Alex) managed to outweigh my complete and utter disdain for Lex, so I enjoyed this episode quite a bit…even though there could have been more Lena. Always. I’m interested to see where KK’s ~~obsession~~ fascination with the women in Kara’s life goes, because it has to be significant. I can’t imagine a world where both of them could exist (outside of fanfic), and that makes me a little bit anxious when I think about the end of this season.

Until next time, my friends and fellow Lenasexuals, I leave you with these parting thoughts.