Hello, friends. What an amazing finale. I’ve seen a lot of TV, and that was one of the best. Amazeballs. The opposite of a shit strumpet. This finale also good.

Before I get into it, I wanted to talk a little bit about why this Wynonna Earp viewing was so special for me. @BridgetOnTV, @nedleysoffice, and @HiDizzle20 all came to my house to watch. The second two were there for dinner, and obviously I served them the most divisive food in the Earper community, mushrooms. My wife made doughnuts for us to enjoy, and I whipped up some mocktails I called Boobs McSeltzers.

Special shout-out to my Earper-adjacent wife, Chris, for being such an accommodating and gracious co-host and making such delicious food. She is the best.

Watching with them was super fun but also a little surreal. I joked that it was like Bridget gets a full-length live reaction video, because even though she was mostly watching the episode and tweeting her gifs (that we all had to get off of wifi for because she’s such a diva), she was watching our reactions a little bit. After the episode, Bridget called in to Whiskey and Doughnuts, and before I knew it, we were on with the cast, which was a super-cool and kind-of-surreal experience. And sorry, Melanie — I know you asked for a house tour, but maybe next time. Cool?

Anyway, grab yourselves a pool table and make yourselves comfortable, Earpers. Let’s do it!

Monica’s Random Thoughts of Randomness:

• Previously on Wynonna Earp, everyone made us cry and laugh and love them and were perfect and flawed and amazing. God, I’ll miss this show.
• Oh, and Waves blew up herself and the other members of her pink squad in order to get Wynonna back to reality. Bobo’s here, has teamed up with the Widows, and broke Doc’s ring. Also, Sheriff Clootie is awake, and Baby Earp is ready to be in this harsh, cruel world.
• I ship a lot of things and people on this show, but one of my OTPs will always be Waverly and weaponry.
  

  

  
• “Shit strumpets” may be one of my favorite Waverly-isms, purely based on the fact that it’s totally something my wife would say. And maybe has.
• I am so glad somebody finally called Bobo out on this. “That’s a woman’s coat.” Way to hit hard, baby girl.
• I have a lot of mixed feelings about Bobo licking Waverly’s gun. That might could be a whole post in and of itself.
• Interesting that Wynonna called Bobo “Robert Svane” the first time instead of Bobo.
• Okay, so I know Melanie Scrofano will do many things in both her personal life and her career, and all of them will be amazing. But can we just take a minute and appreciate how absolutely fucking perfect she is as our heroine? Everyone on this show makes me feel things, but without the star, it would all fall apart. She brings the perfect amount of humor, sadness, misery, and happiness to this role, and makes you cry along with her as easily as you laugh at her dick jokes. She will do a lot of impressive things in her life, I am sure, but I am so grateful that this is one of them. 
• Hello. This show is shot beautifully, and this is the most important relationship on it.
  

  

  

  

  
• So…the barn really isn’t blown up, right? Because it blew up in the alt verse, like Jeremy and Nicole, so it’s okay? I have very strong feelings about the barn.
• I mean, who hasn’t woken up, confused, and started muttering about latex?
• They showed Gus’ truck, and which point I shouted something like, “Sure, show Gus’ truck but don’t tell us where Gus is!” To which I’m sure Bridget started internally cackling.
• I wonder if Wynonna not knowing where she was during the Alternaverse will be a plot point next season.
• Dolls, once again, feels very strongly about Nicole being around, and I do not think it’s because he’s the number-one WayHaught shipper. I mean, I’m not saying he isn’t. I’m just saying that’s not the only reason. Also, Nicole looks so happy that she’s finally definitely a part of the team.
• Wynonna says no more secrets, but…
• I love the look Nicole gives Jeremy when Wynonna keeps saying vagina.
• I seriously love both Widow!Beth’s devotion to her husband AND the fact that Widow!Mercedes is so over it.
• “I got you, Earp.” I love these two together.
• Like Ethan Rayne, Bobo just loves chaos, I think.
• One of the mini storylines I love is that Widow!Mercedes has realized her worth, and it’s partially because of Wynonna. She doesn’t want to be a subservient woman anymore. She sees what she’s capable of because of her “enemy,” and she’s here for it.
• It’s like White Witch Willow and Daenerys Targaryen had a fully grown baby who wants to take over the world.
• Gretta is a character that I enjoy disliking.
• Wynonna Earp is one of those rare shows that literally any grouping of characters together are perfect.
• I like that Dolls is the one to talk down Doc from the well.
• The thought of Wynonna gives Doc life. *sobs all of the tears*
• The little scene between the Earp sisters at Gretta’s is just so nice and a perfect representation of their relationship. Regrets, forgiveness, humor, reassurance.
• Waverly is supposed to be the smart one, but Wynonna is the one who knows that it doesn’t matter what any blood test says. Waverly really is the Earpiest Earp of them all.
• Dear Evelyn: Can we get a 2005 chili cookoff flashback? Related –chili cookoff may be the theme of my next watch party. Open invite, E.
• I really feel like Doc could have had it all, rolling in the deep. Wynonna really did have his heart inside of her hand and played it to the beat.
• This scene is as if White Witch Willow/Mother of Dragons was in the Lost Girl finale.
• Office tweeted out a pic of Nicole’s divorce papers, handled by a lawyer with the same name as the grocery story here.
• Definitely a look of recognition here when Widow!Mercedes mentioned Bulshar. At first, I was confused as to why they kept cutting to Nicole, but then my friend  @EarpYourFandom mentioned a theory in which Nicole’s family were in his cult, which makes this look make total sense. I kept expecting her to vault over the metaphorical couch, breaking the freeze-ray and proving that she’s not entirely human. I was disappointed.
• Love that Doc continues casually smoking. Hey, you’re not ageless anymore. May want to switch to a less-harmful habit, like fishing or running.
• Doc’s speech about where he was when he died gains so many more layers when you find out he was actually in Hell. For example, did he really see Wyatt, just..further south than he led everyone to believe? Was Wyatt in Hell?
• I have heard some theorizing about Peacemaker and the fact that it glows orange when Wynonna points it at Doc. But the thing is, Wynonna always planned on killing the Widows with it, and I think Peacemaker knew that.
• Props to Wardrobe for these super-gay boots and utility belt.
• DOC IS SO PROUD OF HIS WIKIPEDIA USAGE.
• It feels right that Wynonna gives birth in Shorty’s.
• It makes me tear up that, in the middle of contractions, Wynonna stops and takes the time to tell Jeremy that she’s happy he stayed in Purgatory…and then threatens him.
• Does Rosita’s “wait until you have to push” mean that she has given birth? Is it possible that she gave birth as a Revenant?
• Fuck you, The Order. Fuck you for just generally existing, and also for taking out Dr. Navalar. I’m glad you’re probably human kindling.
• Rosita knocking Waverly out is one of the most shocking things I’ve seen this season, and maybe in all of TV ever. I mean, we shouldn’t be surprised because we totally got Andras’d — completely feel one thousand percent about a particular character, only to have those feelings turned on their ear.
• Like, this is also me.
• It’s so deliciously complex that Wynonna only has herself to blame for Rosita turning on her. Well, I guess she can blame Rosita a little bit, too.
• And you can see how conflicted Rosita is, but she feels she has no other choice.
• Can I get a ringtone of Doc Holliday saying “Bobo Del Ray”?
• Bobo calling Waverly “pure” and his angel just adds to the mystery of her backstory.
• JEREMY CALLED BOBO A SHIT TICKET! WELCOME TO THE TEAM, BABY BOY!
• I like that this season’s unofficial theme was throw pillows.
• A theory about why Peacemaker glowed blue instead of orange, and why the bullet just grazed Rosita. Like Kevin said on Whiskey and Doughnuts, Peacemaker is sentient. It allowed itself to be commanded by Wynonna, but Wynonna made a promise to Rosita that she’d be the last Revenant she kills. Peacemaker knows that and is bound by its principles to keep that vow, so even though it shot the bullet, it had no intention of sending her to hell.
• I love that Peacemaker allowed Waverly to wield it just as much as how it then started to burn her hand and her “make up your mind” response.
• This picture. This look. This human. I’m dead.
• This whole scene with the baby? My favorite Earp sisters moment. Final answer. (And it’s the right one. I may retire that question.)
• “You’re the coolest thing I ever did.” I’M NOT CRYING; YOU’RE CRYING.
• Just kidding. I think we are all crying.
• Wynonna really is the best of all of them, because she loved her daughter so much that she sent her away. AND she tells Waverly to make sure Doc gets to see the baby. My heart is breaking for the 1,497th time this season.
• I am there for girlfriends who are there for each other.
• What time is it? Queer boots o’clock.
• I hope that when things settle down, we get a real conversation about Nicole’s marriage, the fact that she kept the DNA results from Waverly, the Waverly/Rosita kiss, and even the hiding of the Mictian possession between these two. I love them as a couple and think they have a good foundation, but queer ladies need to process.
• I wonder how many Revenants Dolls and Wynonna took out. And before someone Earpsplains (credit to @EarpYourFandom again) to me that Dolls can’t kill Revenants, I know. But…if they get kneecapped, I imagine they’d be incapacitated enough that Wynonna could take a minute or two and shoot them.
• JEREMY BROUGHT DOC HIS HAT.
• Nice little hint about Jeremy, giving credence to my guess that he’s some type of seer. And I love him calling our girls WayHaught.
• That scene with the helicopter approaching, before you know who it is — I think that was one of those times where Bridget was anxiously watching us, waiting for our reaction.  When the Gus reveal happened, she WAS NOT DISAPPOINTED BY MY REACTION, I DO NOT THINK.
• My aunt used to just carry me on her lap like that in the car when I was a baby, except she was driving. Oh, the ’70s.
• Perry is a good dude. I see why pre-gay AlternaWaves almost married him three times.
• THEY NEVER EVEN GOT A CHANCE TO BE TOGETHER. TO BE A FAMILY.
• That “dainty and delicate in blue” line was a great callback to S1.
• AUNT GUS IS WAITING. Finally, we find out where the fuck Gus has been this entire season. I am sad that this means her role will probably not be any greater next season, but I now have a dream final scene. Wynonna and Waverly leaving town, driving, stopping at a cozy cabin. The door opens, and it’s Gus and Alice Michelle, everyone finally reunited because the goddamn Earp heir broke the goddamn Earp curse and they can all fucking be together.
• Doc had to have hit his step count about seven times over on this day. Can someone get this guy a bike to travel from Earp sister to well to Earp sister?
• You should never have to say goodbye to your child if you don’t want to. This is just another decision that Wynonna didn’t have the freedom to make. Fate and life and the curse forced her hand. Sending her daughter away was really the only choice.
• Bobo’s use of the word “kin” regarding Waverly is going to be the source of a lot of hiatus conversations.
• It’s a very cool and clever reveal that Doc went to Hell when he died, even though he acted like he was in Heaven. Sort of a reverse Buffy. I can’t wait to see how this plays out next season.
• I disagree, Bobo. Deep down, Doc is a good man.
• Bobo refers to Bulshar as his master, and has previously said that he has the power to keep him from Hell. I wonder if we’ll see S3 Doc bargaining with him to stay out of Hell as well. I think Doc is a character who just wants to live, especially now that he has Wynonna to live for, and he’d be willing to at least consider the possible consequences of another deal with a demon.
• Wynonna and Doc both ask if the other is okay, but clearly are not.
• “Alice Michelle, after your mother and mine.” Yep, crying again, since Wynonna named their daughter after their mothers, and the middle name is a nod to Michelle Lovretta.
• “Mama Earp is still waiting.” WAITING FOR WHAT?! Or just waiting in general. In the land of Evelyn Andrews, there’s no such thing as a throwaway line.
• And did Doc’s lack of surprise mean that he knew that?
• “And there are demons…” *pan to Dolls* “…sweet as clover honey.” *pan to Jeremy and Waverly*
• Love that Nicole got her divorce papers, and I also love/am filled with anxiety about that look between Dolls and Nicole. Where did that file come from? What does Dolls know about her that he is suddenly so anxious to have her on the team, despite his S1 reluctance? Why does she have the ring?!
• A lot of us hoped we’d see Mama Earp this season, and this show didn’t disappoint. What a great reveal. Still a little disappointed that the FanExpo “reveal” that Juan Carlo was Mama Earp appears to be false, but…I guess it’s okay.

Monica’s favorite lines:

• Bobo: New gay Waverly is a little judgy, though I like the new sass.
• Wynonna: No more guilt. No more secrets. We don’t have time for feelings. We need a plan. And we need it fast, ’cause this sucker’s comin’ out my vagina. Yeah, my vagina, Jeremy. Any minute.
• Jeremy: He’s not. I’d feel it in my groin. Wynonna: I feel like just for that, I get to say “vagina” again.
• Widow!Mercedes: Your rotten box can wait on him for eternity.
• Wynonna: Witches get stitches.
• Waverly: Nicole’s married. Wynonna: To a dude?!
• Jeremy: I stay because I don’t fit in here, but none of you ask me to. I’m — I’m allowed to be me. Hi. I’d like to say something about this. How Jeremy feels about our Purgatorian Scooby gang? That’s how I feel about WE and the friends I’ve made from it. We’re all very…unique. We all love this show, but we have different outside interests, favorite sports teams, genders, sexual orientations, geographical locations, favorite characters, etc. Everything. But none of us have asked any of the others to change. We are all free to be our Earper selves, and instead of being made to feel ashamed about it, it’s celebrated. It’s a good feeling, and not one that I myself experience everywhere.
• Wynonna: Oh, Jesus coconuts.
• Wynonna: Great, now the whole gang’s here and is gonna see my Destiny. Should we Skype in Nedley?

Monica’s Final Thoughts:

Sophomore slump? “What the fuck is that?” says this show. That season was amazingly intense. It answered our questions and gave us even more. It wrapped up storylines but didn’t make it seemed forced or abrupt. It gave us new mysteries and a cliffhanger, but, thankfully, not one that had us worried about our favorite characters’ immediate danger, like last season. It gave us more details into the backstory of all of the characters, and gave us new characters that we didn’t know we needed. (I hope we haven’t seen the last of Mercedes, and I know we haven’t seen the last of Rosita.) It gave us the heartbreak of Wynonna giving away her daughter and the possibilities of her connecting with her own mother again. Wynonna Earp season two was a skillfully written and acted masterpiece, and I am so grateful that it exists. Thank you, Emily and cast, for giving us this gift.

Quite honestly, I have a lot of feelings about this episode and the season as a whole, but I’m not feeling coherent enough to put them down on paper, so maybe that will come at a later date.

And on a personal note, thank you to everyone who has read, enjoyed, commented on, and re-tweeted these recaps. I’ve had a blast doing them. I’m hoping to fill in the gaps that my schedule created — write that missing one and flesh out the incomplete ones — and then, depending on how much time I have before season 3, I may do them for season 1, if that’s a thing people would be interested in reading.

In the meantime, time to prep for Dragon Con! I’m super excited to see you there, and for those of you who aren’t going — I’m sad that you aren’t. I wish I could meet every single one of you!