Wynonna Earp 1×02, AKA the One Where We Meet Nicole Haught’s Swagger, Gus Called a Revenant a Nut Sac, and Wynonna is a Crazy Chick with a Gun

Hello, friends! Hopefully I’ve shaken off my recapping rust and the last recap proved enjoyable. It’s really, really nice to be back in the swing of things. I know I miss this show when it’s on hiatus, so hopefully between the podcast and the recaps, I’m helping bring some enjoyment into your lives.

And if not…well, why are you reading? Did you lose a bet? Those are weird terms, but okay.

So, grab a towel (because of those pesky taps), get your snack of lady fingers (GET IT?!), and make sure you have ALL OF YOUR SWAGGER, HAUGHT PANTS STYLE, and let’s do this thing.

Monica’s Random Points of Randomness:

  • Oh, I do love Doc Holliday’s voice.
  • Really, Dolls? You think you can tell Wynonna to be discreet and then it’s all just gonna be okay?
  • Dolls says “I don’t gamble,” and then sends Wynonna into a crowded bar with the wrong gun after a Revenant. That seems like gambling to me.
  • This is the correct answering look to the amazing line “I never blow jobs without a ‘please’ first.” 1
  • I’M sorry, but we’re supposed to believe an attractive blonde would let Red, with his sharpened teeth and weird leather pants that are weirdly baggy, get all up in her business, lady and otherwise?2
  • I’m digging Wynonna’s WWE-esque moves. It’s like when Buffy did the hurrican-rana (on Spike, I think?).
  • Is poking Dolls with the gun really the best idea, Wy?
  • Why must this show talk about tacos so much? Oh, I do love tacos…for they are tasty. *answers 39 tweets from Earpers wanting to make sure I’m okay*
  • Killer Miller really didn’t give that security guard very long to pick a target.
  • Of course the city next to Purgatory is marked on the map as…The Big City…made even more poignant by Waverly staring at it wistfully. Do you see it? Look harder.3
  • Oh, Red. When you need to discredit a woman, Revenant or not, you know to attack her morals. “A rabid case of nymphomania”? Really? Based on what? Ugh. Fucking patriarchy.
  • Who in their right fucking minds would accept a poker game with Doc Holliday? Because even though we don’t technically know who he is, these bros presumably do.4
  • Where did he get money? Is that from Wyatt’s day, or did he run some sort of dry-cleaning service out of the underground spring in the well?
  • When I first watched this, I thought Dolls referring to “the big city” was just a generalization. Didn’t realize that was its map name and all and should have been The Big City.
  • “I’m telling you, none of these are going to work.” Also my words and my face when my friends would talk about cute boys.5
  • That really does sound like something Eleanor Roosevelt would have done.
  • Flamethrower isn’t until later in the season, Wy. And spoiler alert — you don’t get to use it. Sorry.
  • I think I said this in a later recap, but I think it’s odd that Wy’s grandfather Edwin didn’t have a W name.
  • Wynonna’s joy at firing all of the different guns is so…amazing. One of the few times you see her genuinely happy for a few seconds with none of the weight of the curse, her dad and Willa, etc., hanging over her.
  • I really thought hot-dog-stuffed crust pizza was years and years ago, but it was in 2015! That’s crazy!
  • Does Dolls just travel with a picture of Valdita, NM, in his pocket or…
  • Oh, Kate McKinnon’s Justin Bieber Champ, you are super cheerful for someone who tried to fuck your girlfriend’s sister and are now in the presence of both of them. Oh, to have the confidence and self-assurance of a mediocre straight white man.6b
  • Seriously, Waverly, why did you forgive him so quickly?
  • Looks like the sun is helping the stache become the stache we all knew it could be. #StacheGoals7
  • Who are these women hanging with the Revenants? Are they also Revenants or just ladies who dig demons? I mean, whatever makes you happy. Just asking. I guess they’re probably the “human familiars” referenced later, but I just don’t get it. I supposed I was never one for the “bad boy,” though, so maybe I’m not the best judge.
  • Also, these ladies are wearing like tank tops and shorts, and Doc is in a shirt, tie, vest, jacket, and hat…plus pants.
  • And Bobo is wearing his Gaga jacket! What the fuck is with the weather in Purgatory? Do demons and immortals just run cold?!
  • Did Doc have his guns in the well? I wonder if it ever crossed his mind to kill himself. If he did have them, it really speaks to how strong (and stubborn) of a person he is.
  • Doc says it’s only a matter of time before they figure out who he is (Doc) and what he did to Wyatt. He became immortal and took up with a lady of the evening instead of joining him in Purgatory. That’s it, right?
  • There are four motorcycles outside of Shorty’s, but the only people there are Wynonna, Waverly, and Gus. Where’s everyone else?
  • Frida Kahlo indeed…
  • Why are they eating at Shorty’s and not at Gus’?
  • Okay, wow. There’s a lot to unpack here with Waverly’s drawing. Little Waves can spell “Wynonna” but not “Willa.” Everyone is happy but her. I…guess she liked rainbows. 8
  • I LOVE GUS’ ELECTRIC KNIFE. True story — I procured an electric knife for my Gus cosplay.
  • MELANIE. SCROFANO’S. FACE.9
  • Waverly’s entrance may have been one of the best of all time, but Nicole Haught’s opening line? That’s also one for the history books. Queer, attractive in a way that wasn’t as…pretty as most lesbians on TV (not that Nicole/Kat isn’t pretty, but hopefully you know what I mean), confident without being predatory, and also dorkily awkward, my life changed for the better when Nicole Haught walked into it.10
  • OMG, THEY BOTH CHECK EACH OTHER OUT SO SUBTLY.
  • The Earp sisters are very important to me, but WayHaught is an important relationship in its own right, obviously. It’s really unlike anything we’ve seen on TV, and I think Emily Andras and company really captured it perfectly.
  • This scene is so dorky, but also so adorable and amazing.
  • Waverly, the people-pleaser, is going to deny AN OFFICER OF THE LAW a cappuccino just because they’re “not open yet”? I call shenanigans.
  • Heart eyes for days, bitches. Did she ever look at Champ that way?11
  • And when Waverly shoots her down (I mean, kind of, with that “boy man” garbage), Nicole’s like, “Okay, cool.” She’s not pining, at least not openly. She doesn’t try and force it. She asks out the pretty girl and then is fine when it doesn’t happen. Nicole Haught is adult queer lady goals.
  • Welcome to the newest graduate of the Lena Luthor School of “How to Look at Women Platonically.”12
  • So what you’re saying is you expect me to believe there are at least 20 streets in Purgatory.13
  • Dolls is not great at making friends.
  • THERE’S THE STACHE WE ALL KNOW AND LOVE.14
  • Waverly Earpsplaining Doc Holliday about Wyatt is spectacular.
  • Why does Waverly pull back on admitting she’s an Earp? Everyone in town knows who she is! I guess as a precaution. Ugh. Fine.
  • So to pay for Doc’s drink, Waverly pulls money out of her pocket, says it’s out of her tips, and then…drops it in the tip jar?
  • I do love Waverly and Doc’s relationship.
  • Doc doesn’t consider himself a good man, but over the course of the two seasons, we see, just like Wynonna, that he is wrong about himself. They both think they’re these awful people, but they’re brave, honest, hard-working characters who try to do their best with the poor hand they’ve been dealt.
  • “I have my toys; you have yours.”
  • Wynonna dropping the gun while she says “which only I can handle” just makes you fall in love with Wynonna a little bit more. She’s a heroine for all of us.
  • Dolls was such a dick to Nicole.
  • Oh, Dolls. You and your implied treason.
  • Levi seems more human than a lot of the Revenants. Does this mean he made fewer trips to Hell than the others?
  • Bobo says Peacemaker can’t be touched by Revenant hands, but…he can touch Peacemaker. Is it because Peacemaker knew him? Obviously the regular rules don’t apply to Bobo.
  • Much like we see at Nicole’s house, I’m pretty sure that Waverly’s apartment is filled with things from IKEA. Hard to believe they didn’t run into each other there, as I assume it’s located in The Big City.15
  • Head canon — IKEA is where Nicole first spotted Waverly, where she keeps seeing her in the store but is hesitant to approach. Then she sees her in Purgatory and tells herself this is her chance. The next day, she enters Shorty’s.
  • Where did Doc get that hoodie?
  • And his jacket and I think pants have pockets, so…why did he have to put the book in the front of his pants?
  • “But my yoga mat is there.”
  • Mama Earp made the ammolite wind chimes, which is interesting. So she was all in on the curse, as well as the cult.
  • The Homestead sure does suddenly look better.
  • Seriously, what is with this weather? Dolls is in pants, t-shirt, jacket. Wynonna and Waverly are in tank tops, with Waves in her shorts.
  • Everything Wynonna says about their mother has a different weight now that we know she’s alive…and that we know Wynonna knows she’s alive.
  • Shouldn’t they have explained the rules for Killer Miller before Doc gave the blood sacrifice?
  • Even the Revenants love Waverly.
  • Wynonna’s constant badgering of Champ and the fact that her sister is dating him is really good sister business.
  • Good thing Waves has that flashlight…when it’s light out.16
  • The talisman on the Homestead was bound by iron twine. Wonder if the Iron Witch had anything to do with that…or if everyone is Purgatory is just anemic.
  • The Earp sisters are very important to me.17
  • I definitely have the pants Wynonna is wearing. It was originally part of my lesbian lumberjack cosplay, but now there’s a Wy I can cosplay!18
  • WYNONNA, STOP PUTTING YOUR SISTER IN THE CLOSET.
  • I also love when Waves says shit ticket. And when she has one of her many shotguns.
  • Bobo said “it had to be an Earp” and that’s why Waverly had to bury the talisman.  I know, I know. Bobo is not known for his honesty But…maybe when she was a child, he genuinely believed she was an Earp and came to know through Willa that she wasn’t?
  • Wait. Is Waverly digging with a…TIRE IRON?!19
  • And there’s nervous Levi, just holding his axe. Like you do. Doing his best “Xander as Dracula’s minion” impression.20
  • Totally a tire iron. I guess it’s because the shovel is at the bottom of Doc’s well.21
  • Loved Wynonna threatening Levi with her slippers on. Really subtle ways of showing the audience how original our heroine is.
  • “You’re just a girl.” “I am THE girl.” Yeah, you are. You’re the goddamn Earp heir!
  • I just love how much fun Waverly is having. Part of the investigation. Hanging with her sister and Fancy Pants Agent Man. And not to mention, Killer Miller was after HER and not Wynonna. Oh, and she made a new gal pal today. Everything’s coming up Waverly.22
  • I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS RIGHT NOW.23
  • The sisters are just so happy, guys. Making the homestead an actual home. It’s what they’ve always deserved.
  • Wynonna’s impression of Doc saying “defiled by hooligans” is one of my favorites.
  • IN YOUR EYES24
  • And we have episode two ending the same way episode one did with the sisters — by objectifying one of the men. Nice. I’m here for it.
  • We never see Doc wear these jeans again, right? Because they’re terrible. I wish I could enter this show and tell Champ they were made of gluten so he wouldn’t wear them anymore.
  • It seemed like Waverly didn’t blame Wynonna for what happened to Willa and Ward, but here she admits that she did…but I still say not in the same way Wynonna did. And it turns out, it was Waverly’s fault all along. DAMN YOU, WAVERLY. IS NOTHING SACRED.
  • “I like the hat and the shirt, and you’ve definitely got the swagger, but the jeans have got. to. go. 25
  • So, Bobo’s just chilling in his coat and his pants, no shirt?
  • Interesting that Bobo’s Revenant brand shows on his back and not on his face.
  • Asking Levi to bring you Wynonna’s head is a bit like asking Draco Malfoy to kill Albus Dumbledore. I mean, sure..technically they probably could do it, but…are they really the best man for the job?
  • “Boys, I need to make a dramatic speech, and I just need to be shirtless while I do it. I saw it on Buffy, and it really made me take the character of Angel more seriously, especially when he did his tai chi.”26
  • Doc is a good man, but the lengths he’s willing to go to for revenge are great. He has reservations about torturing Levi, but he really just can’t see past the chance for revenge that Bobo is offering him.

Monica’s Final Thoughts:

When I watched this the first time, I remember loving this episode, but when I watch it within the framework of all of the other episodes, I’m not as big of a fan. It felt like there was a lot more plot as opposed to character development, and I’m here for the characters. It was still good and I love watching it, but there’s still a lot of exposition to lay the foundation for.

Shameless plug:

Don’t forget that Michelle, BP, and I have started recording a Wynonna Earp podcast. We are breaking down each episode and are doing some minisodes in which we talk about an individual subject, and we hope to have a new podcast available each week. This week’s is about Doc Holliday! If you haven’t already, please follow us over on the Twitter at @Earpsplainpod. I myself am having a really great time recording this. These two ladies are lovely people who I genuinely enjoy talking to, and their love of TV matches my own — a rare thing.

You can find it at Libsyn, or on iTunes or Google Play

Postscript 

Chris and I celebrated our second anniversary this week, and we are headed on vacation to Reykjavik and Amsterdam this weekend. I’m hoping to blog a bit each day to at least post some pictures, so if traveling is your jam, be sure to check in. And who knows — perhaps Traveling Wynonna will make an appearance!

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Wynonna Earp 1×01, AKA the One Where Wy Got Off the Bus, Waverly Had an Amazing Entrance, Gus Took No Shit, and Our Lives Were Changed Forever

HELLO, EARPERS AND FRIENDS.

Have I mentioned how busy fall season is at work? Or have you just been able to tell from the lack of Earping on my part? Ugh. And I’m so tired when I get home that sometimes instead of writing, I read SuperCorp fanfic, because it relaxes me. But then sometimes I’m reminded that Kara/Mon-el fanfic exists and it makes me sad for humanity.

So, fresh off my recent gig for Docstache, I’m going to start recapping season one. I cannot promise you a posting schedule or any sort of timeline, but I can guarantee they will be:

  • Unnecessarily Long
  • Full of too many screenshots
  • Done before the premiere of season 3
  • Chock-full of pop-culture references
  • Replete with spoilers, so if you’re just reading as you watch, well, locate a legit recapper instead of me

Does that sound like your thing? If so, well, grab your bus ticket and chestnut latte (and a GoGirl just in case), a shovel (though we don’t know why), and be careful of angry sisters wielding shotguns. Here we go!

Monica’s Random Points of Randomness: Continue reading

Podcast!

Important things happen at cons. Specifically, meeting important people. The great thing is that we already have a built-in interest, and that interest is — you guessed it — Wynonna Earp. At Fan Expo and then at Dragon Con, I met Michelle and BP — two EarperView subjects, two fangirl nerds, two fans of The 100 (ugh), and two friends. I was super stoked to introduce them to each other, because they’re basically the same person, and they were delighted to see I was right. Well, not delighted. Begrudgingly amused.

We podcasted about Dragon Con a few weeks ago (and I’m guessing due to the Muppet quality of my voice, it’s been a bitch to edit), and we had a great time discussing Stan Lee, the seventh circle of Hell, and what it’s like to be homeless the day before a con. Our DMs usually circle around discussing TV, and in one of them, BP threw out the name of a podcast — There’s Something in the Heir. I immediately hijacked it and tried to add “Tonight” and make Phil Collins our official opening singer, but her name stuck. Ugh. Whatever, BP.

So, somewhere between work, work, and more work, the three of us have vowed to Earpsplain to each other what the first two seasons involved. If it were up to them, I think we’d be halfway done by now, but I’m on a weird schedule and my free time is in the morning, which is convenient for no one. Myself included.

Things we can promise you:

  • A spoiler-filled look at each episode, discussing how it impacts and is referenced by all the episodes surrounding it
  • Profanity, possibly including the term “cunt edit,” which is a phrase we now use all the time
  • A Hundy Spiral, probably in each episode
  • A lot of laughter, general amusement, and an entertaining way to spend 30-250 minutes

Things we cannot promise you:

  • A set schedule
  • Like…facts
  • That Monica will pay attention or participate during said Hundy Spiral
  • Professionalism

Does that sound like your jam? It does me, because I’d listen to this even if I weren’t involved. Seriously. Those two are awesome. I’m just the word candy.

But don’t just blindly believe everything say. I’ve decided to be a gracious blog overlord and let everyone speak. Here’s what we all have to say about why we decided to do this thing, and because I think blogs are boring without pictures, we’ve included some of our pets.

Monica

I kind of feel like if you’ve found your way here, you already know what I’m about, son, but okay. I had been putting off watching Wynonna Earp for no good reason, and then binged 8 episodes in 36 hours. It took me hours to download the S1 finale on iTunes with the shitty WiFi we had on vacation in Curacao, and then I watched it in bits and pieces in Miami while we waited for things. It’s currently my favorite thing to write about, and I love talking about it, too, especially with these two nerds. They feel about TV the same way I do on a cellular level, and it’s refreshing, familiar, and reassuring. I’m excited.

And this is Graham.

IMG_4756

BP

I can’t believe I’m associated with these weirdos (AKA: amazing pals). Anyway, I binged Wynonna Earp right after season 1 ended and was *a little* late to the fandom experience, but have obviously been welcomed with open arms. I’m “The Banner Girl,” which is only 1 of about 17 names I have. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you’ll see it again soon. It’ll be insane and a lot of fun. Side note: Lora Innes is talented as all get out and I’m so thankful to call her friend.

In my thirties, I’ve come to embrace the reality that what I like is what I like and while my old friends are off having kids, my dog and I are far more interested in fantasy worlds. Whatever, I’m not trying to win “most likely to succeed.” That ship has sailed.

I’m a nerd and I’m fine with it. I think fiction speaks to reality in a way reality sometimes misses. I overanalyze the mess out of things and sometimes in my ramblings, I stumble onto amazing insights and award-worthy new words, like Earpsplain. (You’re welcome.)

I already have a podcast (@adulting098) and these two fellow nerds and I had been fiddling with some WE ideas. The pieces all meshed at some point, and with our powers combined, we became #MoNicMic! I’m the Nic because BP just didn’t jive in that hashtag and Nichole really is my middle name. Convenient, right? Whatever, stop judging me.

There really is something in the heir and we aim to dissect multiple aspects of each episode in 7 hours or less. Definitely less. Probably less.

I’m going to pick back up with photo recaps as we podcast. *pinky swear* (Pinky swears are not actually binding agreements, just FYI.)

One more thing: For your own safety, do NOT mention the name Clarke Griffin around Michelle & I unless you want to be bombarded with fangirl yelling for HOURS UPON HOURS. She’s my favorite. Clarke, not Michelle. Kidding, but not kidding? Hard to say.

I seriously adore these two and can’t wait to go on this journey with them. You might as well tag along.

And this is Auggie.

Michelle

See, here’s the thing. Fuck everyone. All of us have been super busy lately, and Michelle is actually at NYCC, so she didn’t have time to write her blurb about Michelle. So this is Monica, writing about Michelle and basically doing her work, hoping that this won’t be A THING.

Michelle saw her Twitter friends screaming about Wynonna Earp and decided to give it a shot, and she’s been a huge fan ever since. She goes to all of the cons and collects experiences like they’re comic-book covers. She’s made tons of friends in the fandom, but none as wonderful and precious and the two of us. We joked about podcast recording at Dragon Con, and through a DM, the joke became a reality. Of the three of us, Michelle is maybe the most excited about it, since she’s been wanting to do a Wynonna Earp podcast for a while.

She and BP enjoy going into Hundy Spirals and talking about Clarke Griffin doing things For Her People. Her feelings about Clarke and her personal god, Root, make their way into most conversations about TV…and there are a lot of them, because deep philosophical discussions about fictional characters are Michelle’s jam. She’s written recaps for Supergirl, PLL, Wynonna Earp, and Orphan Black for another website, and she thinks she couldn’t have picked better partners for this platonic TV-talking throuple.

And this is Opal.

Well, if you’ve read this and thought, “I AM ALL IN,” congratulations, you’re one of us, too. Our Dragon Con podcast should be coming next week, and hopefully the podcast for our discussion for the pilot will be soon to follow.

Is that your thing? Do you think that’s everybody’s thing, baby? Well, here’s where to find it (and us) on Twitter. There may be more to come, in terms of a website, more content (including photo recaps from BP), etc., but that’s still in the planning stages, much like most things in our lives.

Here are ALL OF THE PLACES to find us and our work.

We hope you are as excited as we are about bringing even more Wynonna Earp content into the universe. There’s Something in the Heir indeed!

Friends in an Elevator: Earping it Up When You’re Going Up and Down

I was mildly chastised by Docstache this week when I published my recap of DragonCon because I didn’t write at all about our elevator selfie, and I had to explain to her that something that important deserves its own post.

ds

IRL, I (accurately) look like a middle-aged lesbian. Put a hat on me and I’m a fresh-faced young man.

Everyone knows about how Docstache and I maybe shared an elevator at ClexaCon, so we decided to re-create that event at DragonCon. The thing is, we forgot to take a picture the first time, so when the elevator doors opened up and someone asked to see the picture, well, we just got right back on, much to the confusion of the cosplayers around us.

We ended up having dinner together on Monday — well, kind of, since she hung out until the very end at the convention so she could stare at Tim, so she missed the ordering part and just watched us eat. Like me, she was unaware that “Tothea” wasn’t a last name, so at least I’m in good company there.

I have to say, since DragonCon has ended, some of my favorite moments at the end of my day are gif/picture threads with Docstache and Visit Purgatory. By the time I get home, my wife and basically everyone I know are asleep, so my Twitter friends really keep me going. I am so happy I got to know these wonderful ladies. You make me laugh and help me wind down after what seems to be a never-ending string of stressful days.

Today, I even got to talk to Docstache on the phone! Like grown-ups do! Seriously, the only person I talk on the phone with is my mom. Also, it was 2am, so thanks for the help in staying awake. And now I’m pretty sure my phone number is in her contact info as “Cathy Tothea.”

I guess what I’m trying to say is, in the elevator of Twitter life, you don’t always choose who you ride with. But if the choice is mine, I’ll always choose you, Docstache.

#DragonCon Wrap-Up

Hello! I swear I am still recovering from DragonCon. I came home and had a pretty nasty cold, so I’m still catching up on life and sleep and laundry, all while working a bajillion hours. It’s been great! I know I covered some of this stuff in the daily recaps we did, but I’m just gonna detail some of it again, probably. It’s my blog and I can do what I want. And bullet points are my friend. Notes in red (literal color commentary) are from Michelle.

  • I landed in the airport on Thursday, and my friends were already there. Apparently they were waiting for me with this sign, but we both missed each other. Too bad, because that shit is hilarious. (I also carried that sign around the entire time I was with Heidi, and I think she wanted me to go away.)
  • We arrived at our Airbnb, and it was a total fail in that they wouldn’t let us in. You can read more about that here, but let me just suggest to you that if this ever happens to you, call their customer service. I did not do that, and I should have. Luckily, my college bestie hooked us up. If she hadn’t, though, so many Earpers reached out and offered solutions and good vibes. In the midst of fuckery, this was welcome positivity.
  • The impromptu Fangirls Shirts meetup was super fun, and I don’t think I gave it its due in the original post. It was great to hang out with old friends and meet new ones, though there were a lot of people and it was a bit overwhelming. As you see, I had kind of a shit day, and a large group of people isn’t always my go-to happy place. But lovely people outweigh the anxiety eventually, and it was great. Beer helped. And so did this picture.
  • You can read about Friday here and the amazing adventure that was Almost Getting Run Over By Stan Lee. We thought we were special, and then as the weekend progressed, we saw more and more people tweeting that it happened to them. I think we need t-shirts. And a support group. Can someone make us a logo?
  • Friday was the day when part of our group passed another part in the skywalk and realized that it was maybe one of the circles of Hell. Seriously, all those people crammed into a tiny space? I wish I had thought to seek medication prior to the con. I had to stick to beer.
  • The most important thing that happened on Friday was probably meeting Docstache. I thought from her EarperView that she would be my jam, and meeting her in person only confirmed that. I was a little hesitant because she seemed to like VP, but I guess to each their own.
  • You can read more in-depth about Saturday here, but I’ll just say it was the day of our Yiska cult rejects cosplay and the day we stereotypically got caught in a parade.
  • One of my favorite things was naming the space between two platonic friends in a small bed The Ghost River Triangle. Don’t cross the line!
  • That con Marriott is basically the Hellmouth. Ugh.
  • Michelle and I drank some lukewarm Corona out of a can while we wrote up the blog because we are classy bitches. (How is there no picture of that?) Because neither of us like to have our picture taken?
  • Remember that time Emily Andras blocked me on Twitter? Me too. And now I’ll never forget because I printed out the notification and asked her to sign it.
  • We had a lovely breakfast on Sunday at The Corner Bakery, and I had a great blueberry hand pie. That’s your most important takeaway for Sunday.
  • Oh, and the evisceration of the patriarchy in two panels.
  • We also hit the Buffy panel, which was a lot less rage inducing. A highlight was when a fellow con-goer asked Charisma Carpenter if she had ever heard the Cordelia jingle from the Buffering the Vampire Slayer podcast, so Michelle provided the audio since it’s one of her alarms.
  • We had a bunch of photo ops that day, which you can read about here. They were all amazing, and I am so happy that we did them.
  • We did some pretty great Bauman poses. Next time, Jill!
  • At the Wynonna Earp panel, Heidi and I asked questions! I was so nervous, but luckily Docstache was behind me to calm me down and provide support. I asked the cast what their favorite Earp sisters moment was, a Known Question of Attack, and it was pretty great. My face got super red, though. Good thing I look amazing at all times, no matter what color my face is.
  • And Marcie asked the question that has divided the Earper community for months, thanks to the negativity of VP — mushrooms on pizza? Emily said yes, so I feel like the discussion is over, guys.
  • That night, we ate at the food court for approximately the 367th time, and Michelle got so angry that she threw her sandwich on the ground outside. Or, the ghost of Stan Lee’s scooter safety mechanism threw it on the ground because she wronged him. (I did a legit spittake in the general direction of my work laptop reading this.)
  • BUT I am a wonderful person and gave her half of my sandwich, but when the story gets told, she never remembers that; only that BP gave her some chicken tenders. And the saddest piece of “Texas toast” ever, because everything is bigger in Texas except for that toast.
  • That night was the Earper meetup, which was super cool. I got to meet some awesome people, but not as many as I should have because I am not great at talking to or approaching people. I wish I were better, and I’m sorry that I didn’t meet all of you because I’m bad at people-ing. I hope to be better by the next con. Probably ClexaCon?
  • But the people that I did meet were awesome, and I had an amazing time talking to them. It was so cool to meet all of you. I particularly loved the discussions about the different fandoms with Carol and Coral. So glad I got to meet you two awesome ladies. Can’t wait to hang out again!
  • Emily, Michael, Tim, and Shamier came to the meetup, too! I got a selfie with Michael, and he was so incredibly lovely. He kept turning to find the most flattering lighting so everyone got the best picture possible. Thank you, Michael. I was horribly sweaty, so, you know, it can only be so good. 
  • And everyone I talked to was OBSESSED with Shamier’s hat.
  • Bridget had been drinking a little and then was interacting with a service dog, so I assumed she was drunkenly not following the rules you should be with service animals, so I was like, “Bridget, you can’t pet service dogs!” But it was okay and I didn’t need to intervene. She insisted that she was sober, and though I’m not sure that was an accurate statement, it appeared that it was cool she was interacting with the dog. Moral of the story? Shut your damn mouth, Monica. B-train knows what’s up.
  • Even when she’s definitely drunk because IT WAS HER BIRTHDAY.
  • Monday morning, we had a kickass breakfast with BP at Waffle House. That may not be interesting to you, but we had a great time and it was amazing. I got mushrooms in my potatoes. Michelle had pickles with her waffle.
  • Monday was the last of the four cast panels. Everyone was so gracious and accommodating and so thoughtful in their answers, and they were all so generous with their time. This fan was very appreciative. Here are some high points:
    • Melanie Scrofano’s spirit animal is “a motherfucking sloth with a machine gun.”
    • Michael Ecklund thinks that Bobo just needs a friend. Gonna be mighty lonely in that well, sir.
    • Tim Rozon ships Doc and Wyatt.
    • Emily says Rosita has more in common with Wynonna than she realizes.
    • It was SO COOL that Shamier stopped in to say goodbye to everyone, and that he’s basically the biggest WayHaught shipper ever.
    • Someone used the phrase “Waverly cheated on Nicole” during a question, and my heart was warmed by how many people groaned.
    • “You can choose who you want to be versus who people tell you you are.” — Emily Andras
    • Kat’s dream guest star is Amy Acker. THAT’S MICHELLE’S DREAM GUEST STAR, TOO, KAT.
    • We have to wait until season 6 for a flashback to the chili cookoff.
    • And the most important lesson — per Emily, shave your legs with conditioner, not with shaving cream/gel/lotion/anything else.
  • Monday, I had dinner (tacos that were super tasty!) with BP, VP, Office, Lynn, Michelle, Heidi, and Docstache. I can’t speak for everyone, but for me, it was probably one of the highlights of the trip. Coincidentally, I also had a giant beer, but I’m sure those are unrelated facts. Here are some highlights:
    • I made a Traveling Deb, which I totally forgot to bust out until then. Sorry, Deb! But you were in my backpack the whole time!
    • At one point, sitting in between VP and BP, I shouted, “I AM SURROUNDED BY INITIALS!?
    • Someone Earpsplained to Office, Docstache, and me that “Emtothea” is “Em to the A,” and not “Em Tothea,” which SOME PEOPLE ARE STILL LAUGHING ABOUT. Hey, I thought maybe Tothea was her maiden name!
    • I also picked up the nickname of Cathy, and it’s because someone told VP that they were disappointed they didn’t talk to Cathy and VP had no idea who they meant. When they said “lesbiyinzer,” she was like, “You mean…Monica?”
    • So now my name is Cathy. Cathy Tothea.
  • After dinner, at our hotel, we did the same thing that many of the Earpers did and hard-core voted for Melanie in the #GirlOnTop contest. And holy shit, if I never see another Captcha again, I’ll be happy. Most of them were roads and bridges and cars, but for some reason I had a special hell that included woodpeckers, cake stands, and storefronts. And I of course live-tweeted it because I am who I am, and someone told me to “stop complaining” about the ones I was getting. O…kay? Like…this is kind of my thing, the “making fun of stuff” part? I wouldn’t call it complaining. But…sure.
  • The worst part about Dragon Con? Leaving. I was happy to come home to my wife and my cat and my house and my larger bed and not walking between 439 hotels each day, but there’s a certain level of comfort that goes along with a con for me. in regular life, when I walk into a room, if I’m lucky, no one notices me. Usually, I get stared at, whether it be for how I’m dressed, what my hair looks like, that I’m holding hands with my wife, that I’m wearing some random nerd t-shirt, or that I just look different (AKA queer) in general. I never feel that way at a convention, and feeling like I belong isn’t something I feel very often. As soon as I hit the airport, I got stared at, and not because someone loved my shirt. Sigh. But only a few more months till ClexaCon, right?

There you have it, friends. Several days of insanity condensed into some words that is probably still Unnecessarily Long. As always, I thank you so much for reading.

I’m hoping to start back up on the recaps I missed this season and then maybe do some for season one. We’ll see what happens. But I definitely have some stuff planned for later this year and next year that I am so excited about, I can hardly contain myself.

Many thanks to Michelle for the literal color commentary and to Heidi for the notes. My life is better with the two of you in it. You keep me sane, organized, colorful, and grateful.

 What’s better than dynamite? Boobs. These boobs in particular.

Happy Birthday, Waverly Earp

I know, I know. I have 18k words to write about DragonCon, and I’m writing a birthday post about everyone’s favorite former cheerleader. But I was struck with inspiration today. Is it medicine-fueled? Maybe. Was it born out of the mental ramblings of my morning nap? Probably. Doesn’t make it any less valid. Let’s see if it’s coherent!

I’m not giving anyone any new information when I say Waverly Earp is an amazing character. In a way, she’s all of us. Sure, personally speaking, I look nothing like Waverly, but we have some similar life experiences. We both had a childhood of overachieving, trying to distract everyone from something “bad” in our lives (Waverly — Wynonna, her family, and the Earp curse; me — being queer) with a whole host of perfection.

Continue reading

#DragonCon Photo Roundup

Guys. We are so fucking tired. [ Editor’s note — we started this Monday night, but it’s now Tuesday and I’m alone trying to write this up. Thanks for abandoning me, assholes. ]

The only blog post I can fathom doing is one with a lot of pictures, so here we go.

Our first professional photo op was one we got with the entire cast. We decided to all hand-write “I am all in” on pieces of paper and hold them up while posing with everyone, and it turned out really, really great, if I do say so myself. And it was during this photo op that I explained to Evelyn Andrews that I only tell people that I don’t like hugs so I can be selective about who I get them from…although it looks like she’s keeping her distance from me here. Hmm.

cast

Next up was a picture of the Wynonna Earp gents. We couldn’t come up with a good idea for this one (we did discuss pointing out the fact that we four queer ladies absolutely love these men, but decided against it). Continue reading